Are you a mom with a dream? It’s so easy for women to put their dream on hold or even forget about it completely once they have kids, because life happens and having a family is hard work and takes all of your time! That’s totally okay, but it’s okay to still have a dream too. For the mom wanting to pursue her dream… I have some tips for you.
Like all moms, I have many roles. Everyone’s specific roles are different, but my roles include: wife, mom, PhD student, employee, and blogger. These are all tips I have learned from my personal experience.
My dream: to become a full time psychology professor.
How am I pursuing that dream? I entered a PhD program for General Psychology in April 2019. I know, right? Like I didn’t already have enough on my plate. But, it’s my dream and I’m going to make it happen.
Here’s what I’ve learned along the way…
Tips for the Mom Wanting to Pursue Her Dream
1. Know your priorities
There are parts of your life that require time, care, and more no matter what. Have all of these in mind and understand what aspects of these can change a bit and what absolutely cannot change. Having this understanding will help you create your plan.
2. Name your dream
Give your dream a name. We all get big ideas in our head, but until we name exactly what it is we want to achieve, we don’t have a full-fledged dream to work towards. Once your dream is named, it has life!
3. Rally Support
Mama, we both know you’re already busy and probably exhausted a majority, if not all, of the time. You’re going to need support. Tell your husband, partner, mother, best friends, any and all of the people on your team what it is you want to achieve and tell them you need their help.
The type of support you need will vary. Sometimes it may be emotional, other times it may be picking up some of your slack. Whatever it is you are lacking in that moment, make sure you have someone to talk you through it… even if it’s just someone to vent to.
4. Create a plan
Have a basic outline of what you want to do. Ask yourself, at least, these questions:
- When do you want to start?
- When do you want to finish?
- How do you want to get from point A to point B?
- What is going to be required of you and your support to crush this goal?
5. Be flexible
You already know this because you’re a mom, but things don’t always go according to plan. Be willing to make whatever changes you can to make your dream happen.
Remember: These changes don’t have to be long-term, so hang in there.
6. Know your limits
It’s important to know what is too much for you. It doesn’t mean you can’t push your limits, but you should be conscious of them. You want to be successful at achieving your dream instead of only giving it half-effort. Knowing your limits will help you to readjust when you need to in order to keep giving it your all.
7. Don’t rush
One of my best pieces of advice: go at your own pace, not someone else’s.
Slow and steady wins the race, and it’s okay if you need to go slower than other people. You have a lot on your plate! What matters is that you’re moving, not how fast you’re moving. Me, I’m completing my PhD one class at a time, and it works for me, so I’m totally okay with it.
8. Accept that you’ll miss out
Adding more to your plate is going to cost you missing out on things sometimes. Hopefully not all of the time.
Don’t let this cloud your vision. Stay focused.
Just remember, it won’t always be this way. You are making these sacrifices for a reason, and in the end you are bettering yourself and therefore your family.
9. Protect your dream
Once you have your dream, protect it every way you can. Don’t let others talk you out of it, or tell you it’s not a good fit. It’s your dream. Not theirs.
Switch around your calendar, weed out the fluff in your life, and do whatever it takes to make your dream a reality.
Being a mom is one of the most rewarding and demanding roles in life, but it doesn’t mean you have to leave the dreams you have behind. It may seem crazy. It may seem overwhelming, but I promise you can do it!
I want to hear from you. Tell me your dream. Do you already have a plan to achieve it?
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